Talking in Riddles

Talking in Riddles

Children of Ursus Previous Hypocrisy Next Business as Usual

Characters

Anna Beehunter Lada Leto/Rosalind Mousse Zima/Sonya ??? Reunion Member Andrey Noble Student Student

Backgrounds

RI Training Compound 1 RI Room 2 Peterheim High 3 School Hall 4

“

Leto, honey drunk, regales Beehunter with tales of her "glorious past." There are some things that the other members of the Ursus Student Self-government Group may not know.

”

<Background 1>
Rhodes Island Training Center One-on-One Close Combat Training Room
[Leto is sparring with Beehunter.]
Leto	Hyah!
Beehunter	Too slow.
Leto	Really? Then why'd you block? Save the talk.
Beehunter	Throw us in the ring and I'll have you on the ground in round one.
Leto	I'm not so sure.
Beehunter	How about this, Leto: You gimme another set. You land a good hit, and I give you a prize. Sound good?
Leto	Yeah, sure Take this!
[Leto and Beehunter trade punches with each other.]
Beehunter	Yeah, not bad. More power in there. Steady breathing too. My turn. For the prize! Oraoraora!
[Beehunter knocks out Leto.]
Leto	Mmh! Phew, *cough,* *hack...* Shura! You...! *Cough* *cough* *hack...* Phew... whew. Can you teach me that move?!
Beehunter	Oh I can teach. But can you learn?
Leto	It's just throwing your fists around a bit. What's to learn?
Beehunter	It's a trick I use against those "bugs" when I'm diggin' out honey. Does good work on the thorny bastards in the ring too.
Leto	Really?
Beehunter	Oh yeah. Total knockout, every time. How else could it go? If you really wanna learn, head outside and dig out some honey. You'll get it quick.
Beehunter	Trust me.
Leto	Eh? Nah, screw that. You're the Beehunter.
Beehunter	The Beehunter's an Ursus who fights for her life. But if we're talkin' about the future? My money's on little Leto.
Leto	Hehe, now that's what I like to hear.
Beehunter	Okay, break's over, come fight me. 'course, if you'd rather take a beating, we can do that too. I'm okay spendin' the rest of our training room time makin' you my punching bag.
Leto	Just you wait, Shura. I'm gonna get you this time!
Beehunter	Ooh— If you can't hit me with your fists, why not get a weapon?
Leto	C'mon, I have my pride, Shura. Although, the training room weapons all have safety features. Getting hit with 'em just hurts a bit. You grab one too. We'll spar.
Beehunter	Sure.
Leto	Knucklers for you?
Beehunter	Plenty of folks in the ring like polearms.
Leto	Hum, finally getting serious, are we?
Beehunter	There's two ways to deal with somebody using a polearm, you know?
Leto	I dunno. Teach me.
Beehunter	Sure.
Announcement	You have—twenty minutes—of time left in this training room. Use your time wisely and prepare the room for use by other operators. Repeat: You have—
Beehunter	Runnin' outta time. Okay, let's go!
Leto	C'mon! So fast! Gah.
<Background fades out and in>
Beehunter	Gulp—
Leto	Gulp gulp, aaahhh—that's sweet.
Beehunter	Don't chug so much water right after training. You'll get midnight cramps.
Leto	That's Future Leto's problem. Right now it feels amazing.
Beehunter	How 'bout it? You learn something today?
Leto	Yeah.
Beehunter	Hehe. Lay it on me.
Leto	Never, ever get close to a boxer.
Beehunter	The knucklers are just there to scare ya. I only came at you with my shoulders and elbows. Plus you got safety gear. No way you got hurt.
Leto	But I couldn't block you at all, Shura. What kind of training did you do to get so fast? You have to teach me.
Beehunter	I fought a lot, I didn't die. Ta-dah. Take enough beatings and you'll learn how somebody's gonna wanna come at you. And if you don't, you get dumpstered pretty quick.
Leto	What about me? Am I dumpstered?
Beehunter	You've got me and your sisters lookin' out for you. You ever end up in a dumpster, we'll come fish you out.
Leto	You say that like I'm garbage.
Beehunter	Hahaha. Don't sweat it, Leto. You're still a kid. Get some experience under your belt and you'll be a lot stronger. No question.
Leto	Don't patronize me! I even—! (Muttering) I even stood up to Reunion.
Beehunter	Huh? (Quietly) Why haven't I heard this before? You're not makin' it up, are ya?
Leto	No way. How about this? Let's go wash up, get something to eat, make ourselves comfortable, and I'll tell you the whole story.
Beehunter	Sounds good. I asked Logistics to make me up a honey drink a couple days ago. Perfect timing. And Dur-nar, I hear she did up some wild snacks the other day. Word on the street is she'll sell you some if you give her the password. Ready? Break.
Leto	Okay. See you back at the dorm. Hey, wait!
Beehunter	What's up?
Leto	Duh. (Quietly) What's the password? It was always Gummy and Her Worship who did stuff like this. I dunno how.
Beehunter	Oh, come here, I'll tell ya. (Quietly) Listen up. I'm only gonna say it once. Don't ask questions.
Leto	(Quietly) Got it.
Beehunter	(Quietly) Dur-nar's Snack Network covers all of Rhodes Island. But for security, you can only get access by invitation from somebody the network trusts. I usually work through Haze. She's hella discreet. (Quietly) You knock six times. Long, short, long, long, short, long. Get it?
Leto	(Quietly) Got it.
Beehunter	(Quietly) Then you make conversation when they open the door. When they say the word "glockenspiel," you gotta immediately reply, "this one's pretty good." Then you'll get the price and you're golden. (Quietly) Don't forget: "Glockennnspiel," long in the middle, short at the end. (Quietly) Get it?
Leto	(Quietly) Got it.
Beehunter	Good. I gotta shower. Later.
Leto	See ya.
[Beehunter leaves.]
Leto	Hmmm— I gotta go through all that just to get some snacks? That's a pain in the ass. I'll just get Gummy to do it.
<Background 2>
One hour later... Rhodes Island Dormitories Leto and Beehunter's Room
Leto	Shura, I got the—Hey, you started drinking already!
Beehunter	I got bored waiting for you. But I bought lots. Why can't I do a little pregaming?
Leto	Yeah all right. I actually nibbled on the snacks a bit on my way back. They're good.
Beehunter	You think the Beehunter would stand for less? C'mon, let's eat, play a hand or two to warm up, and then you tell us about your big adventure.
Leto	Okay.
<Background fades out and in>
Beehunter	Pair of 7s.
Leto	Pair of kings.
Beehunter	Royal.
Leto	Four-of-a-kind.
Beehunter	Straight flush.
Leto	Royal flush.
Beehunter	20, stand.
Leto	Ace, 4. Tough call. Hit me. 5.
Beehunter	Push? Okay, let's go again.
Leto	Hold! Hit me. 7. Hit. 3. Hit. Ace. I win.
Beehunter	I'm done! Wait. What's goin' on today? You always have shitty luck at cards.
Leto	Huh—?
Beehunter	Hey— Is your face red?
Leto	Red? Am I drunk? No way.
Beehunter	We're only three or four cans in, and this is non-alcoholic. You must be drunk on honey just like me!
Leto	Is that a thing?
Beehunter	Yeah! And it's hittin' you a lot harder than it hits me. And here I thought I was the only one who got honey drunk. Heh, hahahaha! Oh this is awesome!
Leto	What're you talking about? The great and mighty Leto would never get *hic* drunk!
Beehunter	Yes, yes, God-Empress Leto. All hail! Hahahahaha!
Leto	What are you laughing at? If we're done with the cards then get over here and listen to the story of Leto the Great.
Beehunter	Yes, Your *snicker* Majesty, Leto the Great. Hehe.
Leto	Listen well, Bee—Beehunter. The G-great One speaks. Nnnng— Right, let's start from the beginning!
Beehunter	I'm havin' way too much fun today. I gotta record this.
Leto	Where are you going, Beehunter?!
Beehunter	To get the Great One something to wet her whistle!
Leto	Oh?
[Someone knocks the door after Beehunter leaves.]
Leto	Who dares?!
Zima	Me. Gummy said you sent her to get snacks. I'm here for my cut.
Leto	Oh!
[Leto opens the door and let Zima enter.]
Leto	Sure, here you go.
Zima	Cool. Thanks. Hm? ......
Leto	What? Is there something on the Great... err, my face?
Zima	Did you eat honey?
Leto	Oh, honey? N– no. Don't be silly.
Zima	Where's Beehunter?
Leto	She's, uh, not here.
[Beehunter returns.]
Beehunter	Oh Mighty Leto—I've brought your refreshments. Hey, Zima, how ya doin'?
Zima	Hmph. Beehunter, come. Let me ask you something.
Beehunter	Oh? What is it?
Zima	What's up with her?
Beehunter	Her? Oh, she's honey drunk. And it's hittin' her way harder than it ever does me. She's supposed to be telling me some story about her adventures before. You wanna listen in too? Or I could just record it for ya.
Zima	Nah.
Leto	Zima—gimme back Beehunter— I gotta—nng, I gotta tell her my glorious war stories—
Zima	Yeah, sure, you can have her. I'm out. Have a good time, Leto.
Leto	Okay! See ya, General Zima!
[Zima leaves.]
Beehunter	*Sigh*. C'mon, Leto. Stop standin' in the door makin' a fool of yourself.
Leto	Leto what?
Beehunter	Fine, fine. Leto the Great and Mighty, get inside already.
Leto	Good enough.
??? (Mousse)	Um, excuse me?
Beehunter & Leto	Huh?
Beehunter	What's up, Mousse?
Mousse	Um, well, I'm sorry to bother you so late. But, if it wouldn't be too much trouble, do you think you could have your conversation inside your room?
Leto	That's exactly what I wanna doooooo.
Beehunter	I am so sorry about the noise. Lemme just close our door there.
Mousse	I'm the one who's sorry!
Beehunter	No, really.
Leto	Nnnnnng!
[Leto closes the door.]
Beehunter	Phew, you're drunker than drunk.
Leto	If you say so. Beehunter! Another can!
Beehunter	Sure, why not? Go big or go home.
Leto	GLUG—GLUG—Ahhh! Awesome.
Beehunter	That good? Let's hear the story.
Leto	Yeah, where were we?
Beehunter	Hadn't even started.
Leto	Oh, huh. Then I guess I better hike up my skirt and start again. Hm... But I should probably drink something first.
Beehunter	Hey!
<Background 3>
Rosalind	Ah— I could go for another ice soda. If only that gang of nobles hadn't taken apart the vending machine. Glug, glug glug. Phew— Hm? Somebody else thinks they can make it out of the campus? The masked dudes just pushed 'em back in. Tsk.
Student A	Hey, aren't you Rosalind from class 3?
Rosalind	Yeah, that's me.
Student B	We're from the Peterheim Benevolent Society. Our boss, Big Andrey, wants you to join us. How about it? Give it some thought?
Rosalind	Nah. Not interested.
Student A	Are you really turning us down?
Rosalind	In the past two days, like four or five different gangs have tried to poach me? I don't even get why we have so many little groups. And they all have such big, tough names.
Student B	Huh? What's that supposed to mean...?
Student A	Woah, don't provoke her. Rosalind, there's kids from a whole bunch of different schools here now. Even a bunch from a noble school got sent to ours. You know how many of our classmates get pushed around by those noble pricks. Isn't it time for us all to band together? Andrey says as long as you come along, he'll treat you right. You'll have food, drinks, anything leftover can go to you too. Just think about it, "General Leto."
Rosalind	Hm... Well... Okay, I agree to your terms.
Student B	Awesome! Thanks for being so reasonable!
Rosalind	Hold on a sec. Don't get too excited. You gotta get me what I want.
Student A	Go on.
Rosalind	Find Sonya and get her to ask me to join.
Student A	Err...
Rosalind	That's all you gotta do, and I'll wear your armband.
Student A	...... ...... We need to think this one over.
Rosalind	Sure. Take your time. See ya.
[The students leave.]
Rosalind	I deal with these boring punks every day. Pain in my ass. Hm? Come on, did I drink that much just now? There's no more? *Sigh*. This sucks.
Noble Student	You're Rosalind.
Rosalind	Here we go again... Yeah, that's me.
Noble Student	You, you, and you, go.
Rosalind	Oh, we're fighting? Wow. Well okay then. This is way more fun than talking!
<Background black>
[Rosalind fights the noble student.]
<Background 2>
Leto	I never had these before. Always too lazy to deal with the shell. Mm, I never knew these nuts were so good.
Beehunter	So that means it wasn't just kids from your school in there already?
Leto	They took students from a bunch of different nearby schools and locked them in with us. Including the gopniks from Her Worship's school.
Beehunter	Sorry, which one are you talking about there?
Leto	Oh, that's Natalya. One of the Ursus girls with us. I just got used to calling her that. She's not a bad girl. But back then she was into some real messed up shit. We all remember. Hey, Beehunter, do the thing for me again.
Beehunter	Which?
Leto	The thing you just did. That trick where you crack the nuts with your hands.
Beehunter	Gimme one.
Leto	Here.
Beehunter	Watch.
<Background black>
[The sound of a punch is heard.]
Student	D- don't kill me! Aieeeee!
[The student flees in fear.]
Rosalind	Coward. *Spit*. You all suck at putting out fires, but you sure are good at stealing. Wait, no. I don't have any food here either. Why are they always coming at me? They're all gopniks from our school. None of these punks have armbands. How am I supposed to know if they're with Andrey or Vasily? I'll take a few bits, just to fill my stomach. I can't keep going like this. They bug me every night. The garbage from #4 took over the cafeteria cold storage, and the other canteen went up in smoke. Drinks are gonna be the least of my problems if this keeps up. I won't have food or water. Gotta think... Hm... What if I went to Sonya? She's already got a couple kids over there, right? She won't mind taking one more. Yeah, that's it. That could work. I offer up a few cans and she'll let me right in. Good idea. That'll be a little more "stable" at least. ...... Never would've thought the the world's second strongest would have to go beg first place for help. ...... But I'd be able to get a good night's sleep over there...
<Background 4>
Rosalind	Hey, Sonya, are you here? I wanna talk to you. Sonya? It's me... Eep?!
Sonya	......
Rosalind	Sonya? Wh- what happened? Pfft. Err, really, I'm coming in.
Sonya	...Hm?
Rosalind	I, uh, didn't mean... I just wanted to, err, I want to join you. Sonya?
Sonya	Rosalind, I need a hand. The ones slumped up against the wall. Take them out for me.
Rosalind	Hey, you didn't really...
Sonya	I have to guard this place. I'm protecting them. I can't leave. I'll owe you.
Rosalind	Uh... Okay. You're the boss. I brought you a few cans. They're yours. And I'll deal with... them.
Sonya	Thanks.
Rosalind	...... You've changed.
<Background 2>
Leto	Did you fall in, Shura? Who takes that long in the bathroom?!
Beehunter	I drank too much.
Leto	Ahahaha! Too fun. Your face is all red too.
Beehunter	You're pretty fun yourself. Huh? Look at you, you can barely talk anymore.
Leto	What?! I've still got a story to tell. Where was I? The second fire?
Beehunter	Fire? What fire? Where's the fire?
Leto	Oh, oh yeah. Now I remember. Hey, Beehunter.
Beehunter	What?
Leto	That life-sized Ursus doll you got, you think you can let me hug her tonight?
Beehunter	Sure. You can have her right now. Think fast.
Leto	Woah, don't throw her! I can't catch like this! So heavy... Aaaahh!
<Background 3>
Rosalind	Heh. Is that all you got? Get up, Andrey. Where'd all your big talk go?!
Andrey	......
Rosalind	He passed out? Well, at least you won't be hungry. Am I right? Huh?! Okay, that's the boss down. Anybody else...?
[A student punches Rosalind from behind.]
Rosalind	Gah! *Cough*, all right, so you can fight dirty.
Student	Gah!
Rosalind	You think I'm that easy? You think I take one hit to the back of the head and go down like in the movies? Huh? Ura!
Student	Ngah! ......
Rosalind	What. Is that it? Hmph. What a waste. Guess this is my food now.
<Background 4>
Rosalind	Ugh... what a headache.
Anna	Sorry... This is our fault...
Rosalind	Naw, we're a team. It's what I'm here for. And look, she isn't in great shape right now. So it's up to me, as Peterheim's second strongest, toAAAAAAaaaaghh that hurts!
Lada	Just a little bit longer. Almost done. Okay, there!
Rosalind	Thanks. That Youth Scout training comes in handy, huh?
Lada	Hehe, thank you.
Rosalind	The world's running out of good people. Lucky to have you. Really. You're great. If that cop had run into kids like you, things would've turned out different. ......
Lada	......
Anna	......
Rosalind	(We can't keep this up.) (We don't have enough food. Don't have enough people.) (Even with me and Sonya.) (Both the food stores are gone. There's just not enough to eat.) (What if a gang shows up to our door someday?) (Even with Sonya...) (I have to think of something...) (......) (I guess I could go talk to the mask dudes?) (No way. What if they turn me into one of those rock-covered monsters?) (......) (I might as well give it a shot.) (You only live once, right?) Hey Anna. We don't have much left in the way of rations. I'm gonna go out for more tonight.
Anna	You can't. You're hurt. If you go out again you'll—
Rosalind	I'm tough. I can handle it. I won't go far. And I won't take anyone's last bite. Don't worry.
<Background 3>
That night...
Rosalind	It's been so long since I've come here. I'm kind of excited.
My heart's really pounding.
Reunion Member	Stop.
Rosalind	This is my old dorm. Why can't I go in?
Reunion Member	Do you want to die?
Rosalind	If I was afraid to die, I'd try to find a way out of the school. No reason to come here. I'm Rosalind, and I wanna talk to your leader.
Reunion Member	Only if you're Infected. Otherwise, no dice.
Rosalind	And if I insist?
I'm scared. Scared to death. But my mouth is still going. I feel like I'm staring into the mouth of hell for the sake of my own pride. And I love it.
Reunion Member	(Drawing his weapon).
???	Let her through.
Reunion Member	? (Lowering his weapon).
???	You, come with me.
Rosalind	Hehe, thanks.
<Background black>
Why did I think it was a good idea to meet the leader of Reunion again? Was it because I'd say a few words to him and he'd let us all go, or give us food? Or was I gonna threaten him? This tiny middle school student? ...... But at least... I had to try. ......
Leto	And... and then...
Beehunter	Zzzzz......
Leto	And then the little white-haired kid with the creepy smile said a few things to me and let me go. I can't remember too well. Something like, "your suffering has only just begun" or "enjoy life" or whatever.
Beehunter	Zzzzz......
Leto	How was I supposed to understand? Then he let me go, just let me go. I went back to the classroom and slept for a while. The next day, the mask dudes were gone.
Beehunter	Zzzzz......
Leto	Things didn't get better after that. We thought life in the school was rough. When we got out, we realized that was just the appetizer. Those stories, they'll eat you alive. Beehunter, say something. Beehunter?
Beehunter	Zzzzz......
Leto	And here you said, you said I was honey drunk. You're the drunk one! Cam't benieve it. You just fall ashleep without saying anything. Whatever. Where's the stage? I wanna jam! Aah, here's my stage. Beehunter's asleep, so you get to hear the rest of my story. I got so, sho mush to say. Phew... whew... Zzzzz......
Beehunter	Zzzzz......
<Background fades out and in>
Dawn the next day...
Leto	— ! Why I am in bed? When did I fall asleep?
Beehunter	Get up.
Leto	What happened, Shura?
Beehunter	What? You're gonna ask me what happened? You guzzled honey drink until you were dead drunk, then you stole my big doll, collapsed on top of her, and drooled out everything you drank.
Leto	Huh? You didn't toss her to me?
Beehunter	Feel for yourself, you dura.
Leto	Don't have to. Sorry, Shura.
Beehunter	Just wash her for me.
Leto	Yeah, of course, no problem.
Beehunter	I'm gonna take out the garbage. You get cleaning.
Leto	Right away!
Beehunter	I'm out. Don't forget afternoon class!
Leto	I won't!
[Beehunter leaves.]
Leto	What did I say to her yesterday? Probably something pretty fun. That's why I woke up so refreshed today. Gotta clean up, have breakfast, then find somebody to help me wash this big girl. Yeah. Not bad. I'll see about drinking with Beehunter again in a couple days. Hold on. Why is my guitar out? ...... Might as well strum a few chords.